Tuesday, August 10, 2004

My previous post was intended to downplay a distinction I feel uncomfortable with but apparently all I succeeded in doing was in resurrecting it. Besides as some of the cogent comments point out, I didn't do the topic justice. Maybe it was premature. So today, I'd like to try something lighter. Ordinarily, that would mean baseball but not this time. First of all, as a Met fan I'm devastated by their hopelessness for the foreseeable future. Second, even though I can keep up with the stats from My Little Town in Israel, eino domeh shmiah le-re'iah. For example, I'm not quite sure from here quite how bad a shortstop Kaz Matsui really is. And reading Blissful Knowledge's sage analysis just makes me feel inadequate as a fan. (His blog is so good, I'm almost willing to forgive him being a Yankee fan. Almost.)

So to the point. I'm getting old, in a bizarre way. Last week I bought herring. If you must know, it was Matjes herring. You see, I didn't simply spear a piece with a toothpick on a whim at kiddush. I pulled it off the shelf, put it in the cart and payed for it, bemachshavah techillah. I actually had a yetzer hara for it. Lately I've begun to think that a nice shtik ayer kichel (must be shaped like a bowtie) would hit the spot. (I'm uncertain about the transliteration of ayer but this seems like a perfectly ironic way to pay homage to the great logical positivist philosopher, A. J. Ayer.) I'm also now farsighted and have taken to holding bottles of bromfen at arms length (my vision problem is rapidly becoming an orthopedic problem).

Do you see where I'm going with this? What's next? Will I soon be eating lokshen mit yokh, taking my chicken boiled and sucking the bones? Will I be slurping my tea and exhaling volubly after each sip? (And if I do, how will I keep that piece of sugar nestled between my upper and lower teeth?) Zug nor, you got a nice piece flanken maybe? Some schvartzen rettich to go with that? Promise me this: if you ever see me even contemplating the galleh/feese/ptcha or whatever they call it where you come from, just shoot me right on the spot and put me out of my misery.

(A nod to Cookie at MOChassid's comments area for putting me in a galleh state of mind.)

5 Comments:

Blogger MoChassid said...

Ben

I must be a little older than you because

a. I've had bi-focals for almost ten years.
b. I've been ordering herring for almost five years
c. I like Borsht
d. I love boiled chicken straight out of the soup
e. I totally suck the bones.

As far as the Mets, I think Kaz is worse than you can imagine. The only reason they aren't putting him at 2nd is because it would be a blow to his 'face'.

Finally, as I was driving to my Sunday morning bike ride at 5 a.m., the dope on WFAN sports radio wouldn't concede that the deal for Benson was stupid even though the Mets are out of contention and they could have gotten him for free in the offseason. Perhaps that's why he's on the radio overnight on Saturday night.

11:37 PM  
Blogger Ben said...

Borsht! Of course, how did I forget Borsht?! But please no Schav.

11:53 PM  
Blogger Adam Ragil said...

Borsht is fine, schav is fine, but no fetishizing :)

1:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ben:

Lately I've started asking the butcher from whom I buy my chickens to put all those scaps of skin he so carefully trims into the bag for me.

Not only does it make a nice bowl of 'gribinis' (sp?), but the biproduct of schmaltz has added a whole new dimension to my chopped liver!

Yes... we're getting old.

David (www.treppenwitz.com)

9:53 AM  
Blogger dghnfgj said...

However mean your gold in wow life is,buy wow gold meet it and live it ;wow gold cheap do not shun it and call it hard names.It is not so bad as you are.It looks poorest when you are richest.The fault-finder will find faults in paradise.wow gold kaufen love your life,poor as it is.maple meso You may perhaps have some pleasant,thrilling,maplestory power leveling glorious hourss,even in a poor-house.The setting sun is reflected from the windows of the alms-house as brightly as from the rich man's abode;the snow melts before its door as early in the spring.sell wow gold I do not see but a quiet mind may live as contentedly there,cheap mesos and have as cheering thoughts,as in a palace.The town's poor seem to me often to live the most independent lives of any.May be they are simply great enough to billig wow gold receive without misgiving.Most think that they are above being supported by the town;powerlevel but it often happens that buy maplestory mesos they are not above supporting themselves by dishonest means.which should be more disreputable.Cultivate poverty like a garden herb,like sage.Do not trouble wow powerleveln yourself much to get new things,maple mesos whether clothes or friends,Turn the old,archlord power leveling return to them.Things do not change;we change.Sell your clothes and keep your thoughts.

3:45 AM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home